- Work Out -
Every summer a fashion publication produces an athletic editorial. And for those 30 seconds it takes to thumb through those pages you think, "I would look cute in that IF I worked out". I get it - I do the same thing. Well, this summer is no exception! This summer I, Fausti Rose, bring you an athletic story! And the 0.5 seconds it takes you to overlook and decide not to read this story is all I need to think, "wow! If only I worked out instead of taking these photos I would be 90 pounds by now!" Or "welp, there goes 1 hour of core strength used to hold this pose for nothing". What ever, I'm going on with my day whether you read this or not because I have a party to attend.
I put the invisible metrics of my website behind me and packed a KIND Bar in my bag and made my way to the event. If I was going to be lazy about working out, I was at least going to eat like a champ while out. I made it to the event an hour late but that was fine because food was being passed around by some pretty model boy. I chased him down and ate the entire plate. I didn't stop there, I ate him too. The chase and and all the eating made me work up an appetite, so I walked over to a group of friends talking near the entrance of food and strike up conversation. I wondered if they knew I was using them to not look desperate for food.
I stayed at the event until I ate everything in sight. I ate so much I couldn't fit my body or embarrassment into a cab. In the 45 minutes it took me to hail a cab to find this out, all the helicopters were out of service for the night. I sat there wondering how I was ever going to get home and the only thing that came to mind was how bad I need to work out if I'm going to continue this until I play out my 20s.